I sit here with a bottle of Pink champagne and some homemade chocolate chip oatmeal cookies ready to watch the third installment of LTYH. My life is good. Moving on to the show…The hot mess that is Julia rears its ugly head as Brandon continues to send confusing messages to her. He claims he knew she was going to get picked by Sheridan, so that’s why he picked Savannah, because he didn’t want to see Sav go home. He is very misleading and I wouldn’t trust him with a bucket of water if my knickers were on fire. Julia should kick him to the curb.
Chris H walks in and tells the gang that conversations need to be had. That’s a comment you hear a LOT lately. No one needs to tell me to have a conversation. I talk, like, nonstop. Also, if I want to communicate with someone, I do it through, you guessed it, conversation.
Julia is telling all the girls, including Savannah, that she is hot for Brandon. She’s then telling Savannah everything that Brandon has said to her, which is totally mean girl. Julia’s like 27 years old and should be past that kind of behavior. She looks much older, her meanness is starting to age her. It’s like she thinks she can talk Savannah out of being with Brandon.
Savannah walks off crying, which is where Gabe finds her and asks her to be his singing partner. Savannah declines, and Gabe leaves. Poor Gabe, we barely knew ye. I would have totally gone for Gabe over Brandon. Brandon is a tool.
The Tool goes out to talk to Savannah, and Savannah responds as if Brandon is a human being with a heart with whom she can reason. He’s not. Brandon asks her to continue on this journey with him. She doesn’t respond, so he says, “Do you want to do this with me, or do you want to go home and cry?” Savannah agrees to be with him and asks him just to be open and honest with her from now on. That’s something that will never happen. They are happy for the moment.
Chris H comes in to let them know the next phase of their journey will be to perform together. Julia is on the couch with Sheridan and looks as if she couldn’t be happier, but the “tears on her pillow bespeak the pain that is in her heart”- Barney Fife. While she and Sheridan are out practicing their song, she keeps looking over her shoulder at Brandon. I wish she would just go home already.
Now who’s this? Bekah and Danny get to go on a date. I barely knew these two were here. They go shopping at Rebecca Mink’s home. I have NO idea who that is, but apparently she’s a stylist to the stars. Is it just me, or is Danny appearing to be the Ricky Martin of “Listen to your Heart?” Danny tries to come on to Bekah in the pool, but she pulls back. Is she seeing what I’m seeing?
Julia is obsessing over Savannah. The green monster of envy has made an entrance as Julia turns her lust for Brandon into anger at Savannah for being fake. I’m not getting where she’s being fake at all. I just wish that Sheridan would tell Julia to hit the road already. Julia tells Savannah she wants to be candid and up front and she wanted to leave because of her. Savannah asks the million dollar question,“Why is MY relationship affecting you so much?” I completely agree, Savannah. Out of one side of her mouth, Julia tells Savannah that Savannah’s being disingenuous about her feelings for Brandon, and out of the other side of her mouth, Julia is completely DISINGENUOUS about HER feelings for Brandon, saying she doesn’t have any. Lies, Julia, lies.
Ryan and Natascha apparently got a date card and are going to House of Blues. Good for them. Rudi and Matt are singing together, and Rudi sounds great, but then falls over because she wants a date with Matt to build their relationship so that they can sing better.
Back to Ryan and Natascha’s date…they come on stage to sing and Natascha keeps hogging the microphone. They act like they’re falling in love. I wonder if Ryan knows that she’s looking for her baby daddy. Her words, not mine. I feel like if Ryan knew that, he might be disturbed.
Rudi and Matt go to practice their song and Rudi falls more in love. The other couples follow with their turns. Jamie messes up the song, and now she’s all stressed, wishing she was better for Trevor. Someone hand the girl a paper bag so she can get some air, because now she’s talked herself into believing she’s a complete loser who’s not good enough for anyone. She’s crying and running away, and we get some insight into why every guy she has ever dated has cheated on her.
The musical competition is about to start. Chris H is looking sharp in a metallic-y gray suit. The judges are announced: JoJo and Jordan, which makes perfect sense (not), Jason Mraz, and Kesha. Kesha does NOT look like Kesha at all, btw. Okay, here’s how it’s going to work. I’m going to give these kids a score of 1-10, and I’ll also tell you about the judges’ comments.
Rudi and Matt: 8. Matt seemed very sweet. Jason M said they did a great job. JoJo enjoyed their performance. Kesha told them to push it to a 12 and let each other shine as bright as you can.
Bri and Chris: 8. Bri overacted a little bit with some massive arm gestures. Jordan and JoJo loved their love connection. Mraz said that he couldn’t figure out if Bri was in love with the audience or Chris. Kesha asked them how they feel about each other. Bri said she’s falling in love with Chris, so we hear no more from Kesh.
Bekah and Danny (They’ve got their new threads on): 6. They decide to sit and sing, which is kind of weird, because they’re like bouncing in their chairs. Danny goes in for a kissy from Bekah, but she pulls away from him in front of the entire audience. Jordan and JoJo can’t figure them out. Jason says their melody was all over the place and Kesha thinks they need some work.
Brandon and Savannah: 7. Not my favorite rendition of “I Want You to Want Me.” The whole time Julia is talking about how fake Savannah is. I think Julia’s a b—-. Jordan and JoJo did not feel the connection. Kesha felt that it wasn’t that big of a connection. Jason Mraz agreed. Evil Julia smiles slyly off to the side.
Julia and Sheridan: 8. If I could score Julia’s fakeness, it would be off the charts. Jordan and JoJo and Kesha all thought that Sheridan was madly in love with Julia. I think that’s probably true, but I think Julia’s the biggest faker known to man. None of them say anything about Julia’s feelings for Sheridan. Probably because there aren’t any.
Ryan and Natascha: 8. I would have given them a higher score except Natascha kept doing this weird thing with her hands. And they kept acting like they wanted to stick their tongues down each other’s throats, which was kind of annoying. Jason Mraz thought Natascha was great, but she outshone Ryan.
Jamie and Trevor: 7 Okay, the whole time, Jamie has continued her full-blown panic attack. She’s doing like frog jumps before she goes out, and she’s crying and talking herself down, and any manner of self-sabotage you can think of. Trevor was good, but Jamie was not in my opinion. Chris H asks Jamie why she’s so emotional, and Jamie feels free to tell us her whole story, which none of us wants to hear. The judges liked them.
Rose Ceremony: So, they’re handing out the roses based on the judges’ scores. Chris H is handing out the roses to the couples; that’s kind of funny. What’s weird is that after Chris calls their names, they have to ask each other if they want their rose. Bekah and Danny do not get roses. Julia is very upset that Brandon and Savannah got one. She is pure evil.
Outtakes: SO all the singers are doing vocal exercises for their voices and Trevor is completely confused. So am I, Trevor. He shows us how he gets his voice ready by taking a big sip of wine. Trev, you’re starting to grow on me. Murrell out.